Monday, April 24, 2006

On a variety of topics

ON WHAT HAPPENED IN ENGLISH CLASS TODAY: Well I had to give that girls paper her review, so when it came time for my turn, I took a deep breath and said "Look, I'm just gonna be brutally honest with you here. You're paper was really hard to read. I mean I know you are trying to make your paper creative and all, and you have a really good idea, but all this is is a pychological evaluation from a character in the book. I felt like I was reading a lab report. A really long lab report. I'm a psychology major, so this stuff interests me and I still found it hard to read. So that's how I feel about it". Well she took it pretty well. I mean am I supposed to lie to this girl? That wouldn't do anyone any good. I hope I didn't come across too harsh on this girl.

ON WHY I HATE GROUP PROJECTS: Because they are pointless, you learn nothing. And it is extremely hard to find a time when everyone can meet. And because I feel like the university is making a point of forcing me to do a certain number of group projects before I graduate. I learned how to cooperate with my peers in grade school, why are they trying to teach me this again?

ON WHY I HAVE DECIDED TO STAY AT UK FOR AN EXTRA SEMESTER: Because I want to finish my business minor so I can be a well-rounded individual. I would feel like I wasted so much time taking those accounting classes if I graduated without my business minor.

ON WHY I AM ANNOYED BY WAR PROTESTERS WITH BULLHORNS: Because protesting is no longer about the war, it is about protesting because you can protest. If you want to have a rally, that's fine with me. Keep it to yourself, don't yell into a bullhorn in front of classroom building every Friday. That just makes people not like you. What gets me really upset is that according to the Kernel, when a teacher asked them to stop because it was interrupting his class, the protest leader said that his protest was more important than the teacher's class. You know what? No it's not. You just want something to argue with. And if this war ended today, I guarantee that you would find something else to protest just to protest.

ON WHY JASON LAMB IS THE FUNNIEST PERSON I KNOW: Only Lambo could go into a restaurant and, when the hostess asked for his name, give them "Myliege" as his last name. That way, when his party was called, she would say "My liege, party of 5." That's hilarious.

ON BLOG STALKERS: Apparently if you read someone's blog consistently and you have not met that person you are their "blog stalker". I would say that's not really true. I have blog stalkers: I have met them (I guess if I met them then they aren't stalkers anymore). Does it bother me? No. I wouldn't put stuff up here if I didn't want people to read it. So, MESSAGE TO "BLOG STALKERS": Keep reading, I don't mind. You are not a stalker for reading a blog and not having met that person. Just don't stare at me through my bedroom window while I am asleep.

Sunday, April 23, 2006

This and That....

What I Know: Bob Gillette and his family joined Porter today, and that makes me happy.
What I Think: Bob Gillette is a freaking stud. I can't wait to be walking down the church hallway and hear him say things like "Now look here beloved.....Real GDP is a better measure of output than nominal GDP.....Amen? Amen?"

What I Know: The softball team lost a heartbreaker this Thursday night.
What I Think: This team has heart. We mounted a nice comeback last game. We've got the tools to win. We will bounce back next week.

What I Know: We all get a little sad sometimes.
What I Think: If you are ever feeling a little down, I have just the remedy for you. Watch Jim Mora rant about how bad his team plated after a game a few years ago. I promise you will laugh and feel better. Or visit this site where it just loops over and over and over....

What I Know: I have to review my fellow students' papers in my English class.
What I Think: So I'm reading this one girls paper and I'm gonna be honest, it was just stupid. She was trying to be creative and what not, but Wes just wasn't buying it. I mean, she is capable of writing well, I have seen her do it before. But this paper was just like reading a lab report. How should I break the news to this girl?

What I Know: I heard my favorite Led Zeppelin, Since I've Been Lovin' You, on the way home tonight.
What I Think: I've never heard a song where a man can make a guitar speak with such emotion like Jimmy Page does in that song. I mean, it's like he sums up all the lyrics of the song into one amazing guitar solo. Amazing.

What I Know: School is not fun.
What I Think: It can be more fun if you make it that way. For a long time in college I was the dude who sat back and listened to people talk, then ridiculed them in my mind because all they did was talk about how drunk they got last night or who they were gonna hook it up with next. And you know what? School was boring and depressing. So I tried something different: I tried talking to people. And you know what? It makes a difference. Your college experience will be much more pleasant, I promise. People are more interested in what you have to say than you may think.

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Ghosts n' Such

Ok so I'm watching this show called Ghost Hunters tonight where these guys run around with all this fancy equipment trying to find ghosts and supernatural activity and what not. Well in this episode they go in this house late at night and this guy and girl on the ghost-hunting team lay in this dude's bed and wait for the ghost to come out. Well they wait a while a no ghost comes. So what do they do to try and get the ghost to come out? They insult it. The dude calls the ghost a wimp and the girl says to the ghost "I don't think you have the b***s to try anything".

HERE'S WHAT YOU DID GHOST HUNTERS: You were trying to find the ghost, but it wouldn't come out. So you taunted it. That's what you did.

Seriously, who taunts a ghost? Is that really the best method of getting the ghost to reveal itself? You think that you are going to insult a ghost enough to where you hurt its pride and so it has to come out and defend it's honor? Absurd. And don't you think that taunting it might make it a little upset? I wouldn't want an angry ghost on my hands. I mean what good can possibly come from insulting the paranormal? You end up with crap like this happening (see image to the right).

Does she look familiar? Remember the girl from The Ring (see left image)? They look an awful lot alike to me. The last thing we really need is that little girl calling people on the phone and telling people " AHHHH YOU WILL DIE IN SEVEN DAYS AHHHHH", then crawling out of people's TV's and killing them.

Bottom line: I don't know about you, but I don't really want dudes like this running around raising up ghosts that can levitate or crawl out of a TV. I already have enough to worry about right now. The saddest part here is that these people get paid for it. That's just rediculous.

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

.....and the answers

The answers to your questions:

Woody asks "I am struggling with the issue of Trichotomy, Dichotomy and Psychosomatic Unity....which do you hold to? Can you also help me with the Traducianism and Creationism view's...little confused."
Answer: You can't see me right now, but I am pushing my glasses up the bridge of my nose.

Liz asks "How will I go on if Benson and Stabler are really not partners anymore? "
Answer: How will any of us go on Liz? Stabler and Benson go together like cookies and milk, for them not to be partners anymore would be a travesty. Let us hope and pray that it doesn't come to that.

Justin asks "What came first the chicken or the egg?"
Answer: The chicken came first, and shortly after that came Chik-Fil-A.

Matt asks "Hey Wes, this girls' parents are trying to set my up with their daughter who lives in another country. Is that weird?"
Answer: Two things are wierd here.....1) The girl's parents are trying to hook you up with her. 2) She lives in another country. Here's what I would do Matt: First, find out what country she lives in and why she is there. Secondly, go there and get to know this girl. Three things can happen: a) you get there, she turns out to be a fantastic girl, and you all get married b) you get there, she turns out to be not quite the girl you are looking for, but she lives in Italy or some nice country like that, so you take a nice little vacation while you are over there, or c) you get there, she is not quite the girl you are looking for, and she lives in some place like Norway where it is cold and there is nothing to do. You've got a 2 out of 3 chance.

Kenny asks "How high is up? "
Answer: Hmmm, that's a tough question KB, so I'm going to give the morally relative answer and say that "up" is whatever height you want it to be.

Andy asks "Why do we have two nipples?"
Answer: Andy, didn't we already discuss this? Do I need to tell you again? Ha ha.

Smitty asks "Why do the sterilize the needle for the lethal injection?"
Answer: Another good question, my best guess is that after they reuse the needles on other prisoners who are being treated for illness.

Perhaps Sunday nights will be "Dear Cooperstown" nights from now on. I will ponder it......

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Dear Cooperstown (Again).........

Let's talk for a second about some simple things that make me happy. I'm driving home from Cheddar's tonight and I've got three things going for me. First, the weather is fantastic. 60 degrees, some heat lightning off in the distance...fantastic. Second, my car smells rediculously great. My Apple-Secented Yankee Candle Gel Car Air-Freshener is awesome. Thirdly, at 11pm every Sunday night on 100.1 FM it's a full hour of Led Zeppelin. So I'm cruisin along, headed for WoFo County, enjoying the weather, inhaling great-smelling air and listening to some of my favorite tunes. That simple 20 minutes makes my day.

Now then, on to business. A good while ago I did a post calls "Coops Gives You Advice" where I addressed several questions that readers of this blog were struggling with. Well I'm bringing it back tonight. If you need some advice, or just have a question about something, let me hear it. Whether it's that question that's been burning your mind all your life or just something simple, I want to answer it. Don't be shy, I know you all have issues that need to be addressed. Well, I'm your man. Give me your best shot.

Friday, April 14, 2006

1-0 Baby!!!!!!

So last night's softball performance was strong to very strong. Minimal errors, solid hitting. That's all there is to it really. Everyone played their part, it was a team effort. But there is need for some special recognition. My awards:

Most Valuable Player: Jeff Griffin. Jeff hit a grand slam that really broke the game wide open. Nice work Francise.

Most Valuable Coach: Troy Woodyard. Coaching third base isn't easy, but T. Woody sure makes it look that way. And I must note that he was stylin' out there too, with his "coach" shirt and thong sandals.

Most Valuable Fan: Morgan Fischer. What is better than Capri-Suns and fruit snacks after the game? Strong work Team Mom.

Web Gem of the Night: How about Chandler's nice double play?


Wednesday, April 12, 2006

That's What I'm Talkin' Bout

Well The Dilemma lost their first indoor soccer game tonight, 8-2. We played a pretty good first half, but we just got tired in the second half. But that's ok, we are all a little rusty (and out of shape). We will get our game back. Next game is Wednesday April 19th @ 9 pm again, same place.

Now normally after losing a game I am not in a very pleasant mood, especially when I did not play as well I could have (as was the case this evening). However, after tonight's game I was excited because of the way we conducted ourselves this evening. There were a lot of eyes watching you tonight: your peers, other players, even some high schoolers from our church. And each and every one of you set a stellar example tonight, and for that I am extremely proud. And you even went beyond that. For a long time now Dustin has been stressing how we need to love each other, and not just at church. I was excited to see so many of you doing that tonight, even if it was in small ways. I saw Chandler help a guy up after he fell in front of goal, I heard Austin compliment the goalie for the other team after he made a nice save. That's what I talkin about fellas!!!! Again, these are small things, but people notice them. At least I know I do.

Sure, we are playing soccer for fun. And to win. But as I said earlier after the game, we also play for a greater reason. This is a ministry just like anything else is. This is going out into the world. There were a lot of lost people there tonight, and maybe just one seed was planted because of how you all acted. Again, I am proud and thankful for that.

So tomorrow night we've got a softball game, and the same things apply regardless of whether it is a church league or not. There's bound to be some bad calls this season, there's bound be some jerks on the other teams, and we're bound to get crushed by at least one team. These are the times when our true colors come out. I was once playing basketball at church with some friends One of the players was a person of high religous status, and he was not setting the best example. I asked my friend about it and he said something to the effect "Yeah, well this isn't the real (name). You can't judge him by how he acts on the basketball court." I beg to differ. When we are pressed and stressed to the limit, that's when our true selves manifest themsleves (that's somwhere in the Bible, forgive me for not knowing where).

Let me just say that I am the chief of sinners here, as I know that I like to argue calls, complain when we are losing, or complain about pretty much anything. But that's not how I should be acting. And I find that when I am obedient to God in those areas, I have more fun at the game, even when things aren't going my way.

So as you are playing tomorrow night, do two things: 1) remember who you are representing when you are out on the field, and remember the real reason that we have a softball team and 2) look for ways to love one another, even if it is something small. I promise that two things will happen: 1) God will be pleased with you and 2) you will find that you are having fun even when we are down by 15 runs to the Mormons.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Song of the Week

So most people who know me are aware that I really don't like Tom Petty. However, he does have one song that I absolutely love. It's ironic, really. That song is Learning to Fly, and it kind of goes along with my last post. It is my "Song of the Week" for this week.

Well I started out down a dirty road
Started out all alone
And the sun went down as I crossed the hill
The town lit up, the world got still

I’m learning to fly, but I ain’t got wings
Comin’ down is the hardest thing

Well the good old days may not return
And the rocks might melt, and the sea may burn

I’m learning to fly but I ain’t got wings
Comin’ down is the hardest thing

Well some say life will beat you down
Break your heart, steal your crown
So I started out for God knows where
But I guess I’ll know when I get there

I’m learning to fly around the clouds
But what goes up must come down
I’m learning to fly but I ain’t got wings
Comin’ down is the hardest thing

I really don't like your music, Tom, but you came up strong on this one.

Sunday, April 09, 2006

In The Game of Life, It's Always Baseball Season

Do you smell that? Do you recognize that smell? Yes, friends, it is baseball season. America's passtime. Church softball. Summer is near. I have had baseball on the mind lately. The Red Sox are doing well (ok, not well, but FABULOUS). Our first church softball game is this Thursday night. Dustin is talking about Fred McGriff a lot. Everywhere you look, it's baseball baseball baseball.

I like baseball; it's not my favorite sport, but I like it. It may not have the beauty that soccer does, the power that football does, or the drunk and rowdy fans that hockey has, but it has intelligence. Baseball is a thinking man's game. You have to be ahead of the game at every at bat. You have to use your resources wisely. You have to react more quickly than in any other sport. Baseball, real baseball, requires you to analyze every play, every pitch, every swing. Attention to detail is paramount to success.

So where am I going with this? Just chill dude (or" just chill girl" if you are female). Don't rush me. Anyway, you know you want this post to go on longer so you can have an excuse to not be doing your work at your desk right now.

Anyway, today I was thinking about how much life is like baseball. Yeah, metaphors are lame, but here me out here. I promise I won't compare God to a pressure-washer who "washes away the sins off our dirty dirty sidewalks that we call souls". But I've done a lot of thinking today, a LOT of thinking today, and somehow baseball just merged into what I was thinking about. And it all fits.

So here we go. Life is one big baseball game. We all have a certain number of at-bats, if you will, times when we are called upon to step up to the plate and take a swing. We step out of the dugout, gaze at the screaming crowd, and walk up to the plate. We dig our feet into the batters box and take our stance, ready for whatever life is going to throw at us. We wait for the pitch. The Pitcher winds up, delivers the pitch, and......

Swing and a miss. A curveball? I thought life only threw fastballs. That's not fair, I want another pitch.

Swing and a miss. A change-up?! Give me a fastball! Another pitch, please.

Swing and a miss. Strike three, you're out. A slider? Are you kidding me? Why won't life give me an easy pitch to hit!

Ah, and therein lies the problem. The Pitcher doesn't give us easy pitches to hit. After all, what good is a batter who can only hit fastballs? He's no good, I tell ya. No good at all.

But that doesn't mean you can't hit a curveball. If you study The Pitcher you can hit almost anything. If you watch the spin on the ball you can hit a slider. If you are patient and don't swing to early you can hit a change-up. And if you follow that ball all the way in and adjust your swing accordingly you can even hit those pesky curveballs.

But most importantly, you must know that you can't hit jack squat if you aren't practicing your swing. Nobody hits a home run the first time they pick up a bat. And even more importantly, you gotta study that scouting report. You better know the Man who is throwing you all these pitches.

Striking out because you couldn't hit the pitches is certainly not a good thing, but what is even worse is not swinging the bat at any pitch and striking out (ahem Troy ahem). Sometimes we are scared, sometimes we aren't ready for the pitch, and sometimes we are too busy waving at the cute girl in the crowd to really care what's going on in the game.

I'm not going to explain the metaphor; take it however you want. But here is my main point: life is gonna throw you curveballs., so you gotta adjust to it. It's cliche, but it's unbelievably true. I've had about 12 curveballs thrown at me this weeks alone. Did I hit any of them? Maybe, I don't really know yet. I guess we'll see.

And keep in mind that even if you make contact with the ball, it won't always be a hit. But I don't think that God wants us to get a hit every time. He just wants us to put the ball in play. And maybe that's why He throws so many different pitches: to get us to hit the ball in different ways. Sometimes he let's us hit a home run, and sometimes he let's us ground out to second. And even if we strike out swinging...hey, at least we learned something from that strikeout and hopefully next time up we will put the bat on the ball.

I'll be honest, I hate adjusting for curveballs, I hate trying to read sliders, and I really hate being patient on change-ups. But that's the way it's gotta be. That's the only way I will become a better baseball player. And I think I am starting to become ok with that.

......I hope that my metaphor has not been too incredibly lame for you........

Monday, April 03, 2006

What's up?

I apologize for the lack of posts lately. I know it gets said a lot, but I was very busy last week so the blog kind of got pushed back into the corner. I finished most of my homework early tonight, so I thought I might break the silence with a quick post.

-The official name, as many of you may know by now, is "The Dilemma", as nominated by the brilliant Troy Woodyard. Had Jason nominated "My Liege" just a bit earlier, it would have been my selection, but alas I had already turned the team in when he posted his suggestion.

-I had a great weekend.

-Tomorrow is the day that Sanctus Real releases their new album The Face of Love. I look forward to it.

-I won't be watching tonights game, mostly becasue I don't care that much.

- #1 Mistake I Made Today: Wearing shorts to school. The wind was blowing about 50 mph today, and it was about 50 degrees with no sun out.

- #2 Mistake I Made Today: Doing the wrong peer review for English class. Oops.

- #1 Thing I Did Right Today: Went to the Student Center for lunch at the same time as Chandler and Kelli. The result: a free meal on Kelli's meal card (and good conversation with the two of them I might add). Thanks best friend.

- #2 Thing I Did Right Today: Got my homework for Wednesday finished. Solid.

-Troy Woodyard Quote of the Week:
-Person A: (to Travis Claypool) Hey Travis, where are you from?
-Travis: Hallsville.
-Person A: Hmmmm, who do I know from Hallsville?
-Troy: (to Person A) Travis.

-Tommorrow night's SVU looks to be even more stellar than usual. It has to be better than lasy weeks performance by Ludacris.

I hope you are all doing well, let's all try to behave ourselves this week.