Monday, August 08, 2005

Hey dude, check this out.......

Over the past weekend a few "phenomena" that occur in our lives several times a week have been brought to my attention by various friends of mine. I thought that this would be a good place to discuss them.......

Phenomenon #1: The PMBC College Phenomenon. Why is it that we as a college group can never make a decision on where to go eat or what to do later without first deliberating over it for an unnecessarily long amount of time? This is the sequence that occurs every Sunday and Wednesday night:

-church/ Bible study ends
-people say "I'm starving, let's go get somthing to eat."
-other people say "Yeah, I'm hungry too. Where should we go eat?"
-Chris says "All I want is a Hawaiin Shaved Ice"
-People discuss food options, but the conversation eventually drifts away from the subject of dinner due to various distractions.
-Chris and Dustin start rave dancing.
-Some funny jokes are told, which are carried on for a few moments, before Andy swoops in a kills them all.
-The discussion of dinner picks up again, with no new ideas.
-Dustin mentions Wendy's, which usually everyone agrees to.
-The crowd moves to the parking lot, where instead of going to their cars, people continue to discuss where they are going to eat, even though it has already been decided.
-Another 15-20 minutes goes by before an absolute and final decision is reached. This usually occurs when someone finally takes initiative and says "Well, I'm going to Wendy's, I'll see you all over there."
-People finally move to their cars.
-At the last minute, someone has a new idea for dinner which they introduce in order to hold up everything even longer. I usually say "Too late, we already made a decision.", which usually seems to settle the issue.
-Finally, cars pull out of the parking lot, after at least 30-40 minutes.

So what is the deal people? Why can't we fix this problem? I will tell you why: money. People with money want to go to sit-down restatraunts, while those of us don't have the funds to spend on that luxury push for the cheaper options (Wendy's). As long as there is this gap in wealth, wel will always have a hard time reaching an agreement on where to dine. As I see it, there are three ways to remedy this:

1. We just agree that we will have to have seperate groups when it comes to dinner: the sit-down people and the fast-food people.
2. The sit-down people can choose to step down a level and join us at Wendy's.
3. Those with cash to spend can pay for the poor people's dinners at nicer resataraunts.

Any of these options will help to expedite the decision-making process, but I fear that they will not fix wholly fix it. Therefore, we must all make a more concerted effort to avoid distractions and to try an reach an agreement ASAP, especially when school starts and people have homework to do.

Phenomenon #2: The Awkward Second Stoplight.

There are times when you are driving down the road with the windows down and you pull up next to someone that you know at a stoplight. Most of us will carry on a brief conversation with that person. Eventually, the light turns green, and traffic moves on. But something strange happens if, by chance, we happen to get stopped at the next stoplight, and once again that same person pulls up next to us. We have already ended the previous conversation with them. This can produce an awkward situation. Do we try to restart the conversation? Do we roll up the window? Or do we just stare forward and ignore them? It can be tricky. Restarting the conversation can be difficult, but if you are skilled enough it can be done. If you roll up the window, you look like a jerk. If you just ignore them, then the other person will probably be grateful that you didn't try to start the conversation up again and make the situation even more awkward. This is often the best route to take, in my opinion. However, do what feels right to you in the situation; use your best judgement.

Phenomenon #3: The "Hey Dude" Phenomenon.

Many of us use this phrase everyday without even realizing it. But where did it come from? Troy Woodyard, of course. Some of his most popular uses of the phrase:

-"Hey dude, are you gonna eat all that?"
-"Hey dude, can you call my phone? I don't know where it is."
-"Hey dude, have you seen my keys?"
-"Hey dude, have you seen my wallet?"
-"Hey dude, what time you wanna mow tommorrow?" (R.I.P, Lawn Barabers)
-"Hey dude, you wanna get a $5 Hot n' Ready pizza?"
-"Hey dude, what you got on my meal?"
-"Hey dude, you wanna hit up the Wind?"
-"Hey dude, can you kinda clean up the house a little bit? My parents are coming over."
-"Hey dude, you gonna let me get that CD from you?"
-"Hey dude, you wanna play some Ghost Recon?"
-"Hey dude, can I get a ride? My car doesn't have any gas."
-"Hey dude, can you drive down Clays Mill Road and look for a hubcap? Mine popped off somewhere along there."
-And of course the infamous "Hey dude........." , followed silence and a blank stare.

This phenomenon has influenced us all, and while Troy did not invent the phrase "Hey dude", he certainly put it to heavy use. It did not take long for it to spread like wildfire among the college and high school classes.

So here's to you, Troy Woodyard, for being such an influential trendsetter among today's youth. Without you, none of us would no how to get someone's attention, or turn a simple sentence into something so cool.

Phenomenon #4: Kelly Clarkson

Why has everyone gotta be hatin on my girl Kelly? She never did anything to you. She is the best singer ever, even if she is mainstream pop. And she's not a punk like Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera, or a poser like Avril Lavigne and Ashlee Simpson. So if you wanna continue disrespecting her, you'd better be ready to throw down, cause I'm done with civilized argument.





posted by Wes @ 1:41 PM

9 Comments:

At 8/08/2005 03:34:00 PM, Blogger Justin said...

kelly is the worst muscial performing artist in the world

 
At 8/08/2005 05:56:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i too, since our conversation wes, have pondered the "going to eat" phenomenon. and here is the conclusion that i have come to.

there are, hmmm, say four people in our college department that everyone wants to be around. whether it is because they are fun to be around, people are attracted to this person(the most frequent), or you know that everyone else is going to be with this person, they dominate all the rest of our decisions. the delay is caused because people want to make sure that they are going to the place that whatever person they really want to be around are going. if that person isnt going to be going, it wont be as fun.

the only reason i know this is because i too, yes me dustin, have fallen victim to delaying the ultimate decision for this reason. then there are the guys who either have girlfriends or dont give a RIP, but they are friends with the people who want to be with that certain someone, so they too are delayed. so these four people, and their groupies, and the friends of the groupies, are the reason for delay.

 
At 8/08/2005 08:02:00 PM, Blogger JTapp said...

Wes,
The "going to eat" phenomenon has happened at Porter College even before there ever was a "Porter College." When I was a wee lad I used to watch the college kids do the same thing.
My freshman year (when Pat & Larry Burns were directors) they came up with a system where everyone put a piece of paper in a box on Sunday morning suggesting where to eat that night. Immediately after service, someone would randomly draw one out of the box, and then everyone would have to go there.
This worked OK for a month or 2.

My other favorite "Hey, dude..." from Troy is when he says "Hey, dude, did you hear about that time...?" and goes on with a story he's told a million times.
"Hey, dude did you hear about that time I almost started a mutiny at Great Harvest?"

Nothing is funnier than the "can you clean up the house a little bit?"

I think Kelly Clarkson is the best pop singer on the radio. All of her songs are catchy and well-sung. I hope her next CD is good.

I don't think she's all that hot though, which is good, because if she was she'd probably do something stupid like marry Kevin Federline or hang out with Paris Hilton.

 
At 8/08/2005 08:04:00 PM, Blogger JTapp said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 8/08/2005 09:51:00 PM, Blogger Wes said...

Dustin, I thought of that also. It is apparent that neither of us are one of those people, but that is cool with me. I have noticed this for many years, and not only in college. You also make a good point with the whole girlfriend/boyfriend thing, as well as their groupies. And what of those who are trying to get their mack on? They can be the greatest of delayers and are the most easily swayed from decisions.

Tapp, I think that would be a fabulous idea but that it would only work for about two weeks. I respect your opinion about Kelly's looks; to each his own. And I had forgotten the whole "mutiny thing",that may have been the funniest.

Sok, you suck as a human being. You had better hope that I am in a good mood the next time I see you, casue if I'm not I am gonna tear into you like a fat kid into a Christmas ham.

 
At 8/08/2005 11:32:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Why does it always have to be about fat people?

 
At 8/09/2005 05:45:00 PM, Blogger Wes said...

I was a large contributor in those days....I did not say I was blameless in all of this.

 
At 8/17/2005 03:27:00 PM, Blogger Josh said...

Kelly Clarkson has been working with Ben Moody, the former guitarist for Evanescence, as will be noted on her next single, "Because of You." Loathe, though I am to admit it, I have been won over, but I think the moniker of "best musical artist ever" may be a bit hyperbolic. Still, she's trying to show us that she is an artist of seething emotional complexity and highly charged, dark vulnerability, and I think it is just adorable.

 
At 8/17/2005 04:50:00 PM, Blogger Wes said...

thanks for the support josh. it is good to see at least one person somewhat agrees with me.

 

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